A feminist pioneer’s tough love for her daughter and how illness broke down barriers between them: Simone Heng’s memoir gets personal
- Simone Heng made broadcasting, whether for HBO or CNN, seem fun, but had a ‘toxic relationship’ with her TV career. She quit, and faced another relationship
- The mother who had shown her more toughness than love growing up in Australia needed her help after a stroke. It was a chance to reconcile after years of pain
Secret Pandemic: The Search for Connection in a Lonely World by Simone Heng, pub. Lioncrest Publishing
If you have ever seen Simone Heng on television, you might have thought she was the most confident human on Earth. Whether she was working for HBO or CNN, presenting a show about travel or rock music, she made broadcasting seem effortless and fun. Which only goes to show that appearances can be deceptive.
“I was hiding in plain sight,” the 38-year-old says from her elegant home in Singapore. “I chose a line of work which allowed me to relive this idea that I was not good enough, that I was unwanted over and over again.”
Today Heng, whose mother is Eurasian and father Chinese, describes her television career as a “toxic relationship”, which is a pretty good way of summing up a love-hate affair you can’t quite bring yourself to end.
Like most immigrants, my parents romanticised the country that they left … the conversations in the house were very Singaporean. The food we ate was Singaporean
“The funny thing about fame is that everyone wants to be the 25-year-old ‘It Girl’. Even when you’re 40, you think you will get that second wind – that you are going to be J. Lo and get a Golden Globe nod at 50. The industry baits you into thinking it could be you even though you see all the bad sides.”
