Dating in the smartphone age: a Chinese-American in Hong Kong discovers, and ditches, dating apps and - shock! - goes Dutch
Newly single in her 40s, Amy Wu quickly discovers the dating game has changed, with dates expecting her to split the bill and app users seemingly all after the same thing
After being single for almost one year, I’ve finally started dating again. It’s liberating, but scary. The possibilities have expanded with the rapid changes in technology, which cross time zones and borders, offering a number of ways to meet people.
When I last dated, in 2010, flip phones were all the rage, you spent more time crafting your text messages, and e-mails were lengthier and more thoughtful.
Facebook and Google existed, but in an era without smartphones, I was able to maintain a comfortable distance from constant news and status updates. The communications landscape was simpler.
Popularity of dating apps in Hong Kong shows technology and love make a good match
There was a common thread to dates I went on in New York and Hong Kong. My date called, we’d make an actual dinner date, we’d both show up, and usually enjoy a good meal and conversation. There seemed to be a formality to it, almost like attending Sunday Mass.
In Hong Kong I found the men, especially Chinese, to be more traditional – asking what kind of food I preferred, opening doors, and almost always picking up the bill for dinner.
Over the years, I spoke about dating and relationships with many men in my life – my father, uncles, cousins, and colleagues, who shared their philosophies about the sexes.
“Men should take care of the big things, such as the house, the car, and trips, and women can find a way to pay for other things,” my father once told me. For a long time, I believed him. But things seem to have shifted dramatically.
